April 25, 2014

Walkabout 2002 – A Final Update To The Story – This Is The End (Or Is It?)

Kelle Sparta

I’ve got about two minutes before my class starts, so this is going to be quick. I’m doing well in the new job, very busy and stressed though. Must have been crazy to run a job fair the first day out, all I’ve been doing ever since is playing catch-up trying to create systems and get procedures in place, plus writing the classes. It’s been crazy. Anyway, I’ve got a week before things get really out of hand, so I’m trying desperately to get things cleaned up. I reclaimed my desk last night, so I can breathe as I sit in my office again. 

The week after next I start the following schedule and it goes for two weeks.
Monday – Teach class 
Tuesday – Take licensure course
Wednesday – catch up on all the things I’m not doing the rest of the week
Thursday – Take licensure course
Friday – Teach class

Blech. I must be some kind of moron, since I did this to myself. After all, I set the schedules. But, at the end of this two weeks, I’ll be ready to take my license test and my first group of newbies will be loosed on the world to wreak havok and make sales (and hopefully make me commissions which was the whole reason I started this stupid process this way in the first place). 

So I’m moving into my new place on the 15th of May and I need everything. As those of you who were around for the giveaway know, I gave EVERYTHING away. If you have extra furniture, kitchen supplies, beds, etc. that you would be willing to donate, please let me know. I’ll be having a housewarming party sometime in early June, I suspect. Depending on how things pan out, it may be “Bring your own chair”. 

Update 2014 – It turns out that my new agents really did have a soft spot for me because by the time my housewarming party happened, they had collectively donated an entire living room full of furniture to me.  A love seat, a sofa, two end tables and a coffee table.  No one had to bring their own chair.  And I got a lovely set of mix and match kitchen wares (pots, pans, silverware, etc.) donated too.  Yet another way in which the law of attraction has worked flawlessly in my life.  And it’s a nice way to come full circle since I gave everything I owned away and was gifted with everything I needed when I came home.  It seems my shamanic initiation was complete. 

So, my life is finally coming together and I am too busy to stand back and appreciate it. But I guess that is the nature of such things. In a few weeks, when my start-up process is complete for work and I’m settled in my new home and not commuting 45 minutes each way, I expect things to be a little less stressful for me. Until then, I hang on and try not to shut down as the roller coaster screams downhill. Whee! This is supposed to be fun, right?

Update 2020:  I have recently sat down and looked once more at the gifts I received while on this walkabout.  It is 18 years since I left on the journey and today I am getting even more insights into its purpose in my life.  Here are the things I now realize I learned:

  1. That people miss me when I’m gone (I had actually thought that when I left places they would suddenly realize I was a bad person and not want to talk to me ever again.)
  2. Where I ended and other people began (the foundation of boundaries) – this I learned by seeing the consistencies in who I was between places, up until then, I had been a mirror of those around me – showing them the parts of me that I thought they would accept and hiding the rest.
  3. Vulnerability. the LiveJournal I kept throughout the journey was what was true for me at the time, and with very few exceptions, I shared my feelings and I didn’t edit my experiences . This was new. VERY new. I had never before let myself be so at risk of people’s judgment.
  4. Healthy Relationships – I also learned how to have a healthy relationship. I had met a man at the beginning of my journey who was practicing polyamory at the time. He had two other lovers. I was on walkabout and had no idea where I would land at the end, so I felt that I had no right to demand exclusivity, so I learned how to hold the relationship more lightly than any I had been in before. I learned to start a relationship with the understanding that it could end at any moment and it forced me to change how I held myself and my power. It was a really valuable lesson for me – one I have continued to this day.
  5. Trust in the Universe. I had trust in the Universe as a child, but as I got older, my need to control my environment to keep myself safe had overshadowed this trust. In the process of waiting for signs and following where the Universe took me on this journey, I rediscovered this trust.
  6. Balancing trust and choice. In the end, I learned that I also needed to step up and make choices rather than abdicating my power to the Universe as I had done at the start of the journey.
  7. That the world is a caring place filled with people wanting to help. So many people stepped up and participated in my journey either through buying me meals, or putting me up, or paying for me to go to events, or calling other friends to arrange a safe place to stay, or hiring me to do readings for them so I’d have gas money. I never went hungry. I never slept in my car or even used my tent (except at the festivals). I was cared for and loved throughout the journey.

    * This is the last entry in the series of posts detailing what happened on a spiritual pilgrimage that I took in 2002. To start from the beginning, go to July 2, 2013. To see the entire spiritual journey as it gets published, click on the category “You Want Me To Do WHAT?!!?” to see all of the posts.


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April 25, 2014