Feeling Judged
*Note: part of the challenge of this journey in 2002 was that I had a few people (one in particular) who were naysayers. They were critical and put me down saying that I was abandoning my responsibilities. They kept posting in the comments on my journal and it made me feel unsafe to actually post what was going on with me.
I have been arguing with myself over what to post here. I have been pulling my punches because I wasn’t sure how much it was safe to post for fear of being judged, specifically by people who don’t know me. I could make this journal private, only open to people who get invited and I may still choose to do this. The problem with doing that, I think, is that only people who are members of Live Journal can be invited and not everyone I meet will be a Live Journal member. My hope was that I could let all those I meet in my journeys know that I am on here so they can follow my progression through the journey of which they were a part. I would like to have that continue to be an option.
For those other Live Journal users out there, perhaps the answer to my problem is to turn off the comment area. I don’t care if people choose to judge me as long as I don’t have to hear it. Does anyone know if this is possible? I will research it shortly and see what I can determine.
See the next step of the journey
*2013 Update – What I came to realize over time on this journey and since is that my biggest judge was me. When I stopped holding myself so harshly in my own mind, I found that the people around me changed (sometimes they changed, sometimes those people left and new ones came in). How are you judging yourself too harshly? Where are you not allowed to be human?
* This is part of an ongoing series of posts detailing what happened on a spiritual pilgrimage that I took in 2002. To start from the beginning, go to July 2, 2013. To see the entire journey as it gets published, click on the category “You Want Me To Do WHAT?!!?” to see all of the posts.